This month we’re talking about gray divorce, death bed visions and the death of American musician Oliver Tree.
Gray Divorce
The New York Times posted an article about “gray divorce”; that is divorce that happens later in life. Gray divorce is becoming more and more popular. The article mostly discusses the emotional reasons for divorce. The article focuses on the fact that elders are no longer staying in marriages for the sake of normalcy when the spark is gone.
We also see clients contemplating gray divorce in our practice, but, often for a different reason. Most people who come to us to discuss divorce later in life are hoping that it will help an ill spouse qualify financially for means-tested benefits like ALTCS. Before we go any further, remember that our practice is in Arizona and I am only referring to the law in Arizona. If you are located elsewhere, you should consult with an attorney from your state.
From our perspective, gray divorce is rarely the right answer for ALTCS qualification. There are a few very specific scenarios where it could work out, like if the well spouse has the majority of the wealth and there is a pre-nup. But, there are other drawbacks to gray divorce.
The Drawbacks
For one, divorce can be expensive and emotionally intense, especially if it’s being done for financial reasons and not because you actually want to get divorced. Divorce also comes with estate planning consequences. A divorced spouse named as a fiduciary in estate planning documents is treated as having predeceased the testator or principal. That means the well spouse might not be able to make decisions for the ill spouse after they get divorced. The well spouse is also treated as having predeceased for purposes of inheriting from a will or trust. The point is, from an elder law perspective, gray divorce is complicated, and you ought to see an elder law attorney (and probably a family law attorney) if you are considering it.
Oliver Tree’s Death (And Grant For Baby Geniuses)
Oliver Tree, an eccentric musician, died on June 14th at the age of 32 in a helicopter crash in Brazil. Only a few months prior to the tragic crash, Oliver appeared on the Zach Sang Show (dressed as Shrek) and explained that on his death, his family would not receive any of his wealth. Instead, he wanted all of his money to go back to the artists. His team wasted no time executing his vision and launched “Dr. Oliver Tree’s Extremely Epic Art Grant for Baby Geniuses Foundation” on June 26th. The foundation aims to inspire artists to create. There will be a celebration of his life and memorial service at the UCSC Quarry Amphitheater in Santa Cruz, California on July 25th. It will also be streamed live.
Deathbed Visions
The Washington Post posted an article about deathbed visions. The article recounts the stories of several people witnessing family members and patients having deathbed visions. The visions are often of loved ones, happy places and important life events. The article suggests that the visions provide comfort to the people who experience them, rather than being scary. They can also offer comfort to the family members surrounding their loved one. The article suggests that these moments can provide opportunities for healing, reconciliation, and storytelling during the final chapter of life.
The article also includes perspectives of hospice nurses and other medical professionals. These professionals recommend that family and friends should not dismiss the visions. They should not argue with a person who is experiencing the vision and instead should approach them with curiosity.
Other news
- A Connecticut woman shares her story of how her caregiver stole her identity while she was recovering from major knee surgery.
- Are you a reader? Check out this book report on Crying in H Mart by Michelle Zauner and how it relates to elder law.
- Social security rules can be a challenge for trustees
- Washington state is looking at a new option for long term care costs.
